Commitment phobia

Many people with commitment phobia have problems with committing to relationships.  Quite often, the people who view this page, and go on to contact me, are not the commitment phobic person themselves, but their frustrated partners. 

The fear of commitment can manifest itself in many forms...

• Expressing unusually high levels of criticism of a partner or relationship.
• Deliberately hurting their partner, effectively giving reason for the relationship to fail.
• Making themselves unattractive to potential partners, so that a relationship doesn't get started in the first place.
• The person may have multiple partners, either all at the same time, or serially, leaving a trail of failed relationships and a lot of tears.
• Having a fear of losing their own identity if they were to allow a relationship to develop.
• May reject all efforts from their partner to discuss marriage.
• May have extremely high expectations in their partners.
• They may socialise with other people they know to be commitment phobic, so as to avoid any relationship issues to come up.
• They may leave a relationship, return to it, leave again, and so on.
• They may also not be able to commit to work, hobbies, timetables, and even therapy!

People who suffer from this phobia have often experienced loss at some time of their life, maybe the divorce  or death of their parents.

"I just wanted to say THANK YOU VERY, VERY MUCH for being so incredibly patient, understanding, helpful, lovely, trustworthy and genuinely nice during the last few months and, most of all, for bringing those AMAZING changes into my life.

I had hoped for some improvement when I came to see you the first time, but I never ever imagined that so many things would be sorted out and that I would feel that much better -- not just about relationships but about myself in general.

It was another failed relationship that made me go and get professional help, not being entirely convinced that there was much I could do about my pattern -- which was always ending up with the wrong guy. But rather than waiting for Mr. Right, I thought it was better to do something about it. And I am so glad I did! My views, opinions and feelings have completely changed.

Along the line, my fear of seeing others being sick and the fear of being sick myself somehow disappeared and I would have never believed before that this could be cured. And guess what? I saw "The Last King of Scotland" on Saturday and there is a scene where the guy vomits and it did not bother me at all. I was so happy that your magic had worked that I actually enjoyed watching it. Spooky!

I really did enjoy the sessions -- with both of you -- they were good fun and you made me laugh so many times -- and they were definitely the most interesting thing I have experienced in my life so far.

I will never forget you and what you did for me - Thank you so, so much!

All the best, take care and see you soon,

Kerstin"

... A Commitment Phobia and Emetophobia client from London

"Thank you so so much for all your help with everything....my commitment phobia is well and truely gone.....and i will never forget you for that....you and Denise were amazing..

I would recommend the treatment and of course you and Denise to anyone and everyone who needs a little help getting back on track.. I think its taken so long to get back to you because i have almost forgotten what it was like to have commitment phobia, there is hope out there for people suffering from it....i never thought i would get through it.....and used to come home crying a couple of times a week because it was so bad....

I wanted to thank you both for being so kind, thoughtful, supportive and wonderful, i will and have recommended you to people...i felt so comfortable talking to you about all sorts of things, like i'd known you for years...

i want other people to know that commitment phobia can be overcome.... i have read threads on websites where people have commitment phobia and they are going mad and think that there is no cure or no way of over coming it.....i thought that too....before i met you..."

Chloe S

... A Commitment Phobia Client from London

Don't Be Afraid To Ask.... I'm Here to Help!

If you'd like any more information about anything that I talk about on my website, don't be afraid to ask... get in touch, and I'll get back to you as soon as I possibly can! :O)

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